Self Love

Movement can be playful!

We are often our own hardest critic.  I know I am.  It’s my Type-A, entrepreneurial spirit. But no matter what our nature or our career path, I think we tend to be harsh with ourselves in a way many of us would never treat anyone else we care for.  We all need to give ourselves a little more self love.

In the past, I somewhat always thought this harshness was a motivator.  Apparently, I respond to drill sergeant mode.  Once upon a time that might have worked for me, but I’m attempting to be gentler with myself.  Partly, I’m just getting tired with age (did I admit that?).  Egging myself on is exhausting.  Plus every year it seems to become more and more obvious that life is too short to waste time being curt with myself. I’ve even drastically reduced my road rage because I came to recognize I was the only one hot and bothered.  The driver that would not let me merge was long gone.

That does not mean that I’m always successful.  It is in my nature to push through without a nap and struggle with […]

Self Love2018-06-19T10:06:03-04:00

To My Mother for Mother’s Day

To my mother:

My mom is the best mom, at least for me.  To keep you reading, she’s not perfect.  If she were, I might not like her as much.  I’d certainly be less impressed.  While I am about to gush about her for a moment, she has her flaws. She is human.  I don’t say that to knock her, but it’s even more impressive to me how much I’ve grown to admire her as a parent knowing, and even liking, her imperfections, for the most part.  Every moment of my childhood wasn’t perfect, although luckily, for me, the good certainly outweighed the bad.  But what my mom gave me was a person in this world who seemed to enjoy me endlessly.  For me, that has been truly vital.

Growing up she made life fun—dancing to show tunes in the living room, swimming in the pond at Misquamicut Beach, nightly massages as she listened to every detail of my day which included obnoxiously, exhaustive, extremely comprehensive information.  If I ate my sandwich top down instead of bottom up, she heard about it.  If I went to the bathroom five times or three, she […]

To My Mother for Mother’s Day2018-02-14T16:46:03-05:00

Secret Wedding

A snapshot from just about 15 years ago. A snapshot from just about 15 years ago.

Matt and I have been together fifteen years today.  We are not married—a fact we don’t try and hide, but we also no longer correct people when they assume we are.  He is my boyfriend, my husband, my mate, my friend, and my partner depending on who is introducing us.

Though we don’t have a desire to get married, we decided we wanted an anniversary party to celebrate fifteen years.  I think we both thought if we didn’t get our families together in some way that one day we would regret it.  And I’m learning in life that we should never say no to celebrations.  Any excuse to celebrate is a good one.

The problem is when you send out invites to your closest friends and family who may have always hoped you would get married, some of them decide you are having a secret wedding.  I immediately got an email back, “Are you guys really getting married?”  No.  And that’s the last I’d heard of it until a few weeks later.  My mom was over and she […]

Secret Wedding2017-12-29T20:00:10-05:00

Reflecting on Valentine’s Day

Okay, I think for the past fifteen years I may have been looking at Valentine’s Day the wrong way. I don’t like the day. I think it puts pressure on relationships; I think it makes single people feel awful; and I think it advocates wasting money.

But then a friend was telling me about how she was just giving little gifts to people who had been really helpful to her this year and she wanted to let them know that she appreciated it. Last year a couple of people put together little care packages or gave me a flower, and it was so nice. I didn’t expect anything from anyone so each little surprise was a pleasant treat throughout the day, especially the cupcakes one of our neighbors left at our door.

Being thought of felt nice. So I think maybe that is the way to look at V-Day–A time to send a card or put a little something together for anyone you love and care for. I hope to think of […]

Reflecting on Valentine’s Day2017-09-12T19:34:29-04:00

Challenge 43: Tell Them You Love Them

Today is Matt’s and my nine year anniversary, and I’m still lucky to be completely infatuated with him. I tell him I love him everyday, and it’s always nice to hear. So today, write a note to someone you love (a friend, a spouse, a parent, a child, a cousin) and tell them why you love them. It will make you and the person you write feel good. Do it now.

(And if you have the time, pick a different person and write them every day this week.)

Here are just some of the reasons I love Matt:
  • He makes me laugh
  • When I need help he’s always there
  • Waking up next to him always makes me smile
  • He smells good (and doesn’t use any cologne or other products)
  • He loves to walk
  • He listens
  • He’ll dance with me
  • He’s smart (and I’m proud of all his accomplishments)
  • He never sweats the small stuff
  • Family is important to him
  • He helped me make a lamp and encourages me
  • He’s a good friend

Okay, I’m realizing I could continue with this fairly easily. But the challenge worked. I’m already smiling and happy […]

Challenge 43: Tell Them You Love Them2017-09-12T19:32:05-04:00
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